Mental health conditions are a common phenomenon in today’s America. In fact, “More than 50% [of Americans] will be diagnosed with a mental illness or disorder at some point in their lifetime.” This –the widespread nature of mental health conditions– may be a well-known fact. What may be more of a shock is just how quick the onset of said conditions is. As mentioned in our episode titled, “Raising a Child With a Mental Health Condition,” “Half of individuals with a mental illness experience onset by the age of 14. This number jumps to 75% by the age of 24.”
As one can imagine, this leaves many caregivers in a spot where they’re struggling and/or are generally uncertain. Luckily, we have some more specific data and many tips for those who may be in this position, presented in the episode by Jordyn (our podcast host) and their mother, Mrs. Murray. But first, let’s define some of the key struggles that may be faced when raising a child with a mental health condition.
Image Source: Kids Helpline
The first main struggle likely faced is identifying that there is a problem, especially for parents with more than 1 child. Mrs. Murray specifically discussed in the episode how she would compare Jordyn, who struggled with a mental health condition from early adolescence, to his brothers and hold the false idea that there couldn’t be a “problem” with Jordyn, as Jordyn’s siblings received the same upbringing and were just “fine.” Upon overcoming the identification struggle, however, were the challenges of acceptance and coping/adjusting with the situation, collectively described by Mrs. Murray as a very lengthy and hard process.
To overcome these struggles, Mrs. Murray gave out much advice, stressing the need to have an open mind and be less judgmental. She discussed the parental instinct to try to “fix” whatever “issues” may arise with one’s child but that this is not something that may be achievable if the “issue” is mental-health related. The danger for caregivers (and as a result, the child) of letting in personal thoughts, feelings, and beliefs was additionally addressed; caregivers should acknowledge that their personal beliefs could be wrong. Diagnosing the mental health condition(s) of their children themselves, for instance, is flawed in that a lot of biases could cloud the assessment. Rather, Mrs. Murray said, “[S]eek professional assistance.” Lastly, Mrs. Murray talked about how professional assistance may not just be beneficial for the child(ren) but also for the caregiver(s), as they should be regularly taking care of themselves as well.
Image Source: NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness)
Awareness and education of mental health conditions was another major subject matter of the episode. Again, an emphasis was placed on keeping one’s mind open and the importance of outside professional help/guidance (in part because they’re less likely to be biased than the caregiver[s]). On the topic of medication, knowing that not all mental health conditions warrant medication and that each individual requires different amounts/types of medication was stressed. Supportiveness, patience, and an understanding that mental health is a highly complex issue were named as key virtues and attitudes a caregiver should have to best support their child. For caregivers who may struggle with being supportive all the time and have moments of impatience, Jordyn said, “[I]t’s okay… don’t put yourself down… [it’s] completely natural, and it’s a process.”
But now to discuss how to put in the work to assist with the situation, let’s start off with the importance of outside support (people who are more so outsiders to the “issue”). Mrs. Murray talked about just how helpful family support was when she was raising Jordyn, stating that if one lacks family support, to seek group support or family counseling, as it can help with the understanding of the situation and help caregivers cope with the situation.
2 other major sources of support for caregivers were identified as religion (if they are religious, of course) and the power of positive thinking through the release of negative thoughts. When it comes to religion, daily rituals like praying can help both parents and children cope with difficult situations, and many religions naturally come with communities of people, a possible source of group support. As for the latter (positive thinking), it’s definitely easier said than done but can help with the release of any mental health stigmas floating around in one’s mind.
Image Source: iStock
Lastly, Jordyn’s mother emphasized how raising a child with a mental health condition is a process and how there are definitely going to be ups and downs. As the episode was drawing to a close, the following pieces of action were suggested as other means for caregivers to benefit children with a mental health condition:
Advocate for mental health awareness
Do whatever possible to make sure the child is feeling comfortable at school (such as asking regularly how the child is doing at school and/or if there are any issues)
Helping the child develop their hobbies, interests, talents, etc. (e.g. Jordyn’s enjoyment of the creative arts)
In summary, raising a child with a mental health condition is a clear challenge. But as stressed repeatedly throughout our episode on this topic, maintaining an open, positive and supportive mind while surrounding oneself with professional advice and outsiders who could assist in coping with the situation can make it surmountable.
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